You know what?
I really wanted to do a mini webcomic strip for my last post. But that has to wait awhile since I'm currently rushing projects, presentation, reports, UI design and playtesting sessions for Module A due in 4 days, and then a final project (16 page magazine + 5 pg website) for Module B that I have ENTIRELY NOT TOUCHED this whole semester due to *ahem ahem*, all of which I BY HOOK OR BY CROOK HAVE TO FINISH IN A WEEK by 27th April because it makes up 100% of the grade.
We'll see whether I get so stressed up that I furiously draw a webcomic to relax or I finish my projects and furiously draw a webcomic to celebrate. So before that happens, I'm obliged to put a word in first. ^_^ Even if its just:
"COMING SOON, to a computer screen near you."
************************************************
Just kidding. I'll write a little more than that. Just to commemerate my survival in this sick module. Take this as the blurb you read at the back of a book before you read a comic. ^_^
(
Gosh I just finished and realized this is super long, so just skim to the end - the bold part - if you don't have time.. If you don't believe me you can scroll down now and see.See?Now just read from the bolded part and come back when you have time - i.e. not pia-ing exams/projects.Good Luck!)
Taking this module is like being in a state of extreme stress all the time and where you also have to think out of the box to survive. It reminded me of the atmosphere during
Naruto's Chunin exam - both the written exam and the forest part (watch the episode on youtube, the link doesn't explain anything). The
HunterxHunter exam too. ^_^
Basically to pass the exams, its half skills, half psychology - having the skills to do things, and being able to withstand stress and psych yourself up. Its about team management, trusting your team mates, knowing their skills and how to make everyone work together to achieve the same aim. Its trying to be one step ahead so you don't miss your step and die.
Its been a very hard module to get through, because of the speed of the assignments and the constant reshuffling of project mates. VC almost didn't manage to get a programmer on our team for project 1 because all the groups formed up so fast. But in the end Yuhan liked our idea and decided to join us so we didn't die.
For the presentation group Toan took the lead to get everyone together, and then I realized that I needed to take the lead to get the group for WPF, because I no longer wanted to be just passively waiting for someone to pick me. Its somewhate disadvantagous to wait, you might just get left out like in proj 1. And then you die. Besides, it is much harder to form a WPF group due to the restrictions. So I did up a table of who worked with who before and then went to approach people based on that... and then end up I'm the first to form a WPF group so everyone panicked and cemented their group that night too.
I was quite surprised though. I didn't expect such a reaction - in fact I've never been so active in classes before, its just because I felt that the class demanded people to be more proactive, and I've seen people in class being proactive, so I just tried it out. ^_^
That's something good about the class - by having proactive people in the class, it affects and changes the way other people think and work. You learn alot from people around you. And CS3216 is the only kind of class that allows proactive people to be proactive - just because it is so turbulent! Things move and change so fast, even passive people like me are forced to become proactive.
On hindsight, I realized what the first class was all about. The round of introductions was meant to be a stage on which we "sell" ourselves, so other people in class can have a better idea of who to pick for projects later on. Argh, totally missed out on that and brought a dusty old hand painted bag down >_<. It pales in comparison to what everyone else had to show; I was a little embarressed after that. Though it really did summarize me very well - literature, arts and crafts...old fashioned and outdated.
I really learnt a lot on the current state of technology during this class, especially during WPF...when I suggest ideas for our app and Dingyan and Hongting will look and me and say - "its been done, weiman. Go check out etc etc etc..." Den I'll *sian*. Plus they introduced me to new apps like Twitter...and showed me that you can actually control your powerpoint presentations through your handphone....etc etc etc - LOTS.
Things I've totally never thought were possible just yet. Technology that can improve my life and work alot. And this is going to sound super sua ku to you but when they hooked up my laptop to another keyboard and a monitor and taught me how to manipulate what's showing up on the monitors so I can work in comfort, I was super happy. ^_^
Oh, another thing about that 3 nights pia-ing WPF in Engineering Block. We were making an application, so that requires alot of icons. And icons look best when done in Illustrator because resizing them is easier and it looks much cleaner. When I started WPF, I did not know illustrator AT ALL. But it was my own personal standard that forced me to picke up illustrator... because I know in order to make the app look good it has GOT to be illustrator art. But time was running short...and I was very worried I wouldn't be able to pick up illustrator on time.
In the end, I stuck with the illustrator decision, sat down in front of my (happily modified) laptop-monitor-keyboard-thing, and started the "Learn Illustrator in 30 days" tutorials. In 4 hours straight, and with many delighted screams when I completed cool tutorials, I finished all of them...and I could use illustrator as I wish. It was insane. I couldn't believe it. I could replicate this and this in illustrator. Check out our app to see them man...Toan and Hui Hui's help were also invaluable during that period, since they were both illustrator pros. Nevertheless, I would have never imagined that I could manage to master illustrator in that short span of one week...I hated illustrator before this, because it is so hard to learn. I'll probably never have hauled my lazy ass around to tackle it if not for this module. This is one skill that I learnt during the course will be useful to me for my whole life..
I learnt that I had a social life too, when the module started interfering with it. YES I so do remember the Musical clashing with the pitching session. But as I said, it is important to me, and I will never regret choosing it over the pitching session. Not to mention I cancelled outings with my friends and even CNY visiting just to rush projects for this module. And like Yu ming I got frustrated alot with trying to balance work and life and almost broke down - there was only one previous incident where I was so stressed and that was when I was overworking myself for hall - I ended up hyperventilating then, and I swore that I'll never get so stressed up again, so I left hall. But that was after 1.5 years of overworking for hall, and I'm doing the same for this module I've only been in for 6 weeks?! That is so not making sense. I broke out in stress related ecezma too.
That was the wake up call - I had to relax, or else I'll really just collapse into a jumble of nerves. After WPF, which happily was the 1 week holiday, I lazed about all day, went out to take Watchmen pictures, and went out with friends. It was amazing - the eczema cleared straight away. It came back a little for the final project tho. =( But I believe I have learnt to manage my stress better.
Still, no matter how evil and horrendous the whole module has been, I agree with Prof Ben's methods. If you want to make someone learn, you put them through hell and high water. But you always watch out for them to help them out if they are really drowning to death.
I know this because I was in one of the top few NPCC units in secondary school. (Shot a .22 revolver then too, so I understand the Prof Ben shooting analogy during the last lecture. ^_^) It made me who I am today. As a cadet I had my fair share of hell. As a sec 4 NCO in charge, I learnt to make hell useful to my cadets.
I remember one incident during the Annual Training Camp where we make the cadets do drills in the dark, steal their rifles at night, call impromptu fire drills when they are sleeping + assorted hell. There was a company that was being punished, about 150 push ups by the end of the day. There was this Sec 1 cadet who did 150 push ups along with the rest, but she's got extra 25 to go because we stole her rifle in the morning. She was quite exhausted and she said, "ma'am, I cannot do any more." while still in push up position.
She was new, so she didn't know that in our unit, there's no such thing as "cannot". You never tell your seniors "cannot", because they can very well give you hell (i.e. +25 more) the moment you say that. So you try your best every time to finish up.
But there was sweat streaming down her face and it was really late at night, plus she had to do this herself, alone, so it was really difficult for her. Still, I believed she could finish it...if she still had the energy to speak, I'm sure she still had the energy for 25 more. My squadmate was next to me so she started to ask the cadet to stop and rest, but I interrupted her.
"No." I said. I knelt down next to the cadet, looked her in the eye, and told her "You can do it one. I'll count down with you."
So I counted down for her each time she did one more. 24...23...22...21... I could see her mustering all her will and effort for every extra one she did. It was hard. She had to slow down a couple of times. But I was always encouraging her when she paused - 9 more, only 9 more, come on, you can do it... - and in the end she did it. All 25 extra on top of the 150 straight. She was even able to stand up after that. And I could see that she was surprised at herself. I'd made her push beyond her limits and taught her that she could achieve more than she had expected.
When I left secondary school, she thanked me in a note. I was surprised that in the note she remembered the encouragement I gave her "when she thought she couldn't make it anymore" and not the part where I was being evil and insisted on giving her hell. Hahaha...
But I guess this is how things work out - it is what you've learnt that has made an impression on you, not the hell that you've been through. That's what this module is like too, I guess. It is hell, no doubt about it. But its what you learn from hell that you remember the most.
I guess what I'll remember most is that I have learnt to believe in my ability to make a difference to this world. Before the module I'd always thought that I was too insignificant to make enough of a dent - I didn't believe in alot of things, and one of them was that I could ever be successful. My art isn't good, really, if you compare it to professional standards and I doubt I can even get a job by it. Which is a problem because all I ever wanted to do was to be a character artist, or a comic artist. My writing isn't that good either, which also is a problem because I wanted to be an author or a comic book writer. And then certain injuries prevent me from being a dancer. Seems like all I can do is be a game producer..a job that I don't really like, although I liked making games. And random sai kang like designing costumes and decorating hall dining rooms which I felt made a difference but no one really cared.
But things are different now. This module has taught me that there are people out there that can help me achieve what I want to achieve. The whole class is like a microcosm of the world - there are all kinds of talented people in it, I just have to go out there, find them, and persuade them that what I want to do is useful and meaningful to the world. And of course tell them how they can benefit from it. To try to do everything single-handedly is a fantasy, most people aren't talented enough or if they are, they don't have enough time to do so. You don't have to do everything yourself, and you don't have to feel bad that you can't do everything yourself. Because there are always people around who can help you - JUST ASK DAMNIT. And pick the right people to help you achieve your dream.
I've also stopped comparing myself to people much better than me. Chinese proverb time: "There will always be a mountain higher than the highest mountain you see." I've become more confident as an artist, because this module allowed me to work on my art a lot. In fact, my skill set for this module has always been artist artist artist, from project 1, to wpf to final project. I've learnt alot as an artist during this module, especially with regards to working with programmers. Learn how to use SSH and SVN in proj1 and final project respectively. Which I am very grateful for because it is actually practical. Like I learnt about how programmers put in artwork and now I try to keep naming conventions the same when I modify the art. At any rate, I am the best that I can be now, so all I need to do....is to move upwards. Faster. My art teacher told me he used to draw 100 drawings a day for a few months..and so he improved super fast during that time..
The holidays are coming. May is for that. ^_^ And then... I'll work on some stories, enter some competitions, draw, write, hopefully get published one day... I need to go out and meet more people... more people who share my dream... and perhaps everything will fall into place one day. ^_^
Now I believe in being ready when opportunity knocks on my door, and its time to start preparing. I might not succeed in what I want to do, but I have a back up plan, and I'm not worried if I fail.
Thanks Prof Ben for designing this module, its been an eventful and interesting semester. Its the people in class that makes CS3216 so different from other modules though, most of what I've learnt, I've learnt from my classmates and project mates, who showed me how ignorant I am, and time and again showed me different perspectives and possibilities. Especially Jason and his bots. I was just totally dumbfounded by that.
Last comment - I'm super impressed by the Xiaonei team...their perseverance and determination is admirable, and their presentation for the (Olympic scoring) group discussion was the best. I really loved the little sticker quotes they pasted on their poster too, it really cohered with what their application was about and made it more convincing. They really deserve the success they are having with My Campus, and I hope it just gets better and better for them. ^_^
Oh, and don't forget:
Confessions of a CS3216 Mugger
"COMING SOON, to a computer screen near you."
Good luck everyone for exams and projects!!! ^_^ This chapter closes, but the next one always begins straight after! ^_^
